Do You Agape Me More than These?

Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me more than these?” He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love You.” John 21:15b

When asked the greatest commandment, Jesus said to him, “You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind” (Matthew 22:37). In other words, God wants your love for Him to exceed all other loves in your life.

The Deepest Love

In John 21, Jesus is using the word agape—love on the spiritual level. The Greeks had several words for love: eros (love on a physical level); on a deeper level, phileo (love on an emotional level); and then the deepest, agape (love that transcends even emotions, love on a spiritual level).

When God gave the Ten Commandments to Moses, the first was, “You shall have no other gods before Me” (Deuteronomy 5:7). Likewise, you are to have no other loves that are above God. Jesus is essentially asking Peter, “Is your love for Me greater than your love for these?” What were the ‘these’ that Jesus was referring to? There are several possibilities.

Love of Ambition, Success

Perhaps He was referring to Peter’s past livelihood of fishing. Jesus had called him to leave his nets and follow Him, “and I will make you fishers of men” (Matthew 4:19b). There’s nothing wrong with fishing or hunting, having things in your life that you deeply enjoy. What’s wrong is when those things exceed your love for the Lord—when they become the greatest love of your life, when you're willing to sacrifice your relationship with Him to indulge in these things.

In the context, Peter had been fishing all night on the Sea of Tiberias and had caught nothing; then Jesus had miraculously filled their nets to overflowing—the greatest success for a fisherman. Jesus may very well have been asking: “Do you love Me more than the pinnacle of success in your career? More than your fondest ambition? More than all you hope to attain or achieve in life? Your highest goals?”

There are many people who lose out in their relationship with the Lord on this very point. They have a love for the Lord, but they love other things more. Thus they lose out in that close relationship that God desires to have with them.

Loving Jesus More

Perhaps Jesus was looking at the other disciples when He asked, “Do you love Me more than these?” Remember, at the Last Supper, Peter had boasted that even if all the other disciples abandoned Jesus, he would stand by Him. Asking this question three times would also remind Peter that He had denied the Lord three times before the rooster crowed. Jesus is giving Peter the opportunity to reaffirm his love for Jesus as many times as he had denied Him.

If Jesus were to ask you today: “Do you love me more than these?”—what would be the things in your own life that are vying for your attention? What things are drawing your love away from Him?

For some, it’s an ungodly relationship, falling in love with someone who doesn’t care about the things of the Lord, who pressures you to compromise and sin against God. You don’t want to lose them, but do you love them more than the Lord? Are you willing to sacrifice your relationship with Jesus to keep them?

Many a Christian has been tripped up this way: They have allowed their friendships or relationships to come before their relationship with Jesus. Or they have made sinful compromises for success in their life or careers.

The Cost to Follow Jesus

Someone has said that everybody has their price. What price would you take in exchange for your relationship with Jesus? It will certainly cost you to follow Jesus. Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. … For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul? (Matthew 16:24, 26).

Sadly, many do opt for the temporary pleasures of this world over eternal pleasures. Maybe you’ve been caught up in the pleasures of this world, spending hours in front of the television or online to be entertained. And these things have robbed you of spending time with Him. Jesus said to love not in word but in deed and in truth. He declared that if we love Him, we will keep His commandments.

Merely Fond of Jesus?

When Jesus asked Peter if he loved Him (agape), Peter answered that he had a phileo (a lesser) love for Him. In essence, when Jesus asked, “Do you love Me intensely and supremely?”—Peter answered twice, “Lord, You know that I’m fond of You.” Then the third time, Jesus also uses this word phileo: “Peter, are you fond of Me?” And Peter was grieved at this; it cut him to the heart. Jesus was looking for this deeper love, but then He came down to Peter’s level. This was a tragedy.

The Lord wants us to love Him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. When we will not come up to His level of love—that supreme love relationship He desires with us—He will come down to ours. He will meet you where you are and do the very best for you on that level. But He has so much more for you. Are you trying to bring God down to your level, making compromises, unwilling to rise to the highest heights that God has for you?

Return to Me

Jesus is asking you today: “Do you love Me?” On a scale of 1 to 10, where would you rate your love for God? What keeps you from loving Him supremely? Many times we pursue other ambitions, other loves, and then we find they are empty and we run back to the Lord. But then something else comes along. God forgive us for being so fickle! Have you been walking in compromise?

If so, take this opportunity to return to your first love. Repent, and return to the first works, as Jesus urged the church of Ephesus in Revelation 2. Come back to Him. Love Him with all your heart, and He will draw you up to His level. Let the Spirit of God just draw you into that close, deep, beautiful relationship that God wants with you because He loves you.

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